To Speak Or Not To Speak At The Wedding

 Are you the bride or bridesmaid and unsure if you should speak at the wedding or not? Would you like to speak? Do you feel you are being pressured into speaking? Or have you taken it upon yourself to speak without asking others?

Wedding speeches can be a sensitive topic when organising your wedding. Traditionally, only the groom and groomsmen speak at the wedding reception and although times have changed, there are things to consider before you make your decision to speak or not.

First things first, if you are the bride it is important to consider your husband-to-be in your decision. It may seem old-fashioned, however, asking your husband if he would like you to speak at your wedding or not is a good idea. If you have a strong personality then your partner may enjoy speaking on this occasion. Some grooms feel very proud on their wedding night and want to take the moment to tell you how much they care about you.

 If you are a bridesmaid, then you need to check in with the bride to see if she wants you to speak or not. Some brides expect their bridesmaid to speak as part of fulfilling their role, while other brides don't like bridesmaids speaking at all.

If you make the decision to speak as the bride or bridesmaid, there are some important pointers you should take note of before preparing your speech.

1. Do not be too soppy! Practice your speech before the big day and leave out any triggers you know will make you cry.

2. Keep it short and sweet. Don’t talk for too long and don’t be the longest speech on the night. Guests easily get bored and you will lose your audience with a long-winded speech. Keep it to five minutes.

3. Thank just the once. If you are the bride do not repeat the same thank you’s the groom has already addressed. Talk with him before the wedding to ensure you aren't doubling up. One thank you that should be on your list is for the groom’s parents for accepting you into their family and trusting you with their son. They will love hearing this.

4. Don’t embarrass the bride. If you are the bridesmaid remember this is not your best friend’s 21st birthday celebrations. Trying to be funny or bringing up stories that other’s won’t find funny will only instigate eye rolls and embarrass the bride.

5. Be prepared. This is one time not to wing it. Spend time before the big day planning out your speech.

Recommendations aside,  the most important thing to remember is not to drink too much before the speeches. A few stiff drinks will not help calm your pre-speech nerves, instead, you could end up slurring or worst still, crying into the microphone. Nobody wants to be remembered as the drunk bride or bridesmaid that spoke at the wedding.

Keep your speech short, punchy, a little bit funny and a little bit romantic and you will be sure to be remembered for all the right reasons.

We want to know, are you planning on speaking at the wedding?